Dancing with Myself

Question for Gov. Mike Huckabee

Governor, I was over at your website earlier today and I have to tell you, some of your positions disturb me greatly.  What do you have against homosexuals?  Is it just your religion, or do you have some darker fear of homosexuals?  You brag about codifying the Arkansas Constitution to protect the people of Arkansas from Gays and Lesbians in committed relationships, even in the face of the Federal Defense of Marriage Act.  That appears to be pandering to bigotry.  Now that we've had same-sex marriage in some places for a few years now, do you know of a single marriage that has been put in jeopardy by same-sex couples being married, or by being in domestic partnerships in the several other states that have advanced that far.  Details, governor, details.  Is your marriage on the rocks because of Gays and Lesbians in committed relationships?

And while we're at it, what do you offer same-sex committed couples?  Your history and platform seem to be so extreme that I think you're homophobic.  That's a shame, too, because you seem like a nice guy otherwise. 

Yep, you strike me as one more Christianist extremist with more in common with fundamental Islam that with most Americans.  At least you're not a Mormon -- not that there's anything wrong with Mormons, anymore than there's anything wrong with Scientologists, Evangelicals, Southern Baptists, or any of those other mainstream cults. 

Public Restroom Etiquette

And there is also an unspoken agreement that we don’t look at each other or even make eye contact if we don’t have to. There may be an occasional “excuse me” if people need to get around each other, but other than that there is very little conversation in a public restroom except maybe the occasional chatter between friends and nobody cares about that. This is not a homophobic thing; it’s a privacy thing. You are there to do one thing (ok, maybe TWO things *badoom boom tiiissshh!*), wash your hands and exit. You don’t need idle chatter from strangers or even your own friends. With privacy at a minimum already, keeping the socializing down to a very dull roar is a way of restoring some of it. SO! One really has to make some obvious overtures, I think (I’ve never been propositioned like Tucker; I’m sure it happens) to get some lovin’. To be clear, I am not ruling out that people BREAK the rules, or that still others have experienced unwanted advances, but I imagine that it’s because of these unspoken rules that this bathroom sex community needed to work up a series of signals so as NOT to piss off the random stranger or get themselves arrested. - A Comment by Bonkers over at the Crooks and Liars post on Tucker Carlson. 

Those are the rules for White, heterosexual men.  I have noticed that straight White men have an almost paranoid reaction to social interaction in public restrooms.  Gay men chat a lot more.  People of Color talk a lot more.  This Gay man, who grew up using two- and three-seat outhouses, has always been a little bit social when it comes to taking care of business.  I'll say hello, ask you what's happening, comment on sports or politics or even the weather.  On the other hand, for reasons delineated in the above link, I am the most dedicated person in the world when it comes to taking care of my business.  I am in and out in two, maybe three minutes flat, whereas the straight men in my office go into the toilet with a newspaper and a magazine and will hang out on the throne for half an hour at a time.  I find that type of behavior to be more suspicion arousing than just saying hello. 

The only rule I can think of that is absolute is to control the direction of your flow.  Don't turn towards me with tool in hand and say, "Pardon?  What did you say?"  That's wrong.  Pissing on someone's boots will get you in a world of hurt, regardless of whether you're Gay, straight, Black, Green, or in a hurry.  Otherwise, any rules you come up with for restroom etiquette are just your opinion about your own limitations and expectations.  I grew up different, me.

Moving Beyond the Dichotomy of Gay vs. Straight

"Instead of running from the tabloid fodder, late night talk show jokes, and Sunday morning sermons that will undoubtedly come from this incident; the LGBT community should instead embrace Sen. Craig’s gay sex solicitation incident as an opportunity to talk candidly and knowledgeably about the fluidity of sexuality and its effects upon gay identity and gay sexual orientation." - H. Alexander Robinson, CEO of the National Black Justice Coalition

An interesting perspective on the demise of Senator Larry Craig.  Do go and read the entire article.

Is Tucker Carlson an Idiot?

Inquiring minds want to know.  Oh, sure, he looks totally fagged out in his trademark bowtie, and let's not overlook his mincing creepiness, but to brag about beating someone up because they made a pass at him?  That's over the line.   From Media Matters.

First, they make fun of Craig.

CARLSON: Let me be clear, Dan. I am not gay. I have never been gay. I overreacted and made a poor decision.

SCARBOROUGH: And you love your -- you love your wife, Tucker. Let me just say for the record, I am not gay, either.

CARLSON: Let me -- let me put it this way. Whether he's gay or not actually is not our business, and I do think it's indefensible that the newspaper in Idaho spent a year interviewing 300 people to answer the question, Is he gay? That's none of your business. Having sex in a public men's room is outrageous. It's also really common. I've been bothered in men's rooms. I think people who do -

SCARBOROUGH: Really?

CARLSON: Yeah, I have. You know what, Let me just say.

SCARBOROUGH: Wait, hold on a second. Dan, hold on a second. I don't mean to take over, but have you been bothered in public restrooms, Dan? Because I know I haven't.

CARLSON: I have. I've been bothered in Georgetown Park. When I was in high school.

ABRAMS: Really?

CARLSON: Yes.

SCARBOROUGH: Wow.

CARLSON: And let me just say, I think --

SCARBOROUGH: That's something.

CARLSON: -- people should knock that off. I'm not anti-gay in the slightest, but that's really common, and the gay rights groups ought to disavow that kind of crap because, you know, that actually does bother people who didn't ask for being bothered. So yeah, I think it's outrageous that he did that. And also, this specter of him getting up there and blaming other people is so Clintonian. You know, if he just said, "I'm not going to talk about it," that'd be one thing.

ABRAMS: And -- and this notion --

[crosstalk]

CARLSON: But he's clearly crazy.

ABRAMS: Well, and this notion that he pled guilty, and yet he's saying, "Oh, you know what? I never should have done that."

SCARBOROUGH: Well, it's the newspaper's fault.

CARLSON: Well it's ridiculous. It's ridiculous.

ABRAMS: Well it's the newspaper -- it's everyone's fault except his own. I mean, I've never heard of -- I mean, you're a U.S. senator, and you're thinking you're going to make it go away --

SCARBOROUGH: But hold on a second, though, Dan --

ABRAMS: -- by pleading guilty after you're busted in a public bathroom?

SCARBOROUGH: Hold on a second. You have Bill Clinton, who actually went out and did the same exact thing. He showed defiance. He said, "I did not have sex with that woman, Ms. Lewinsky." And he continued that line not only for months in the press, but then he went before a grand jury and said the same thing. And it -- you know what? Here's the thing. It worked for Bill Clinton. His wife went on TV and she blamed, remember, the vast right-wing conspiracy that's been trying to take down her husband.

I don't dredge this up to knock the Clintons. That is history, and it's a -- ugh -- it is a nasty part of our history, and I'm glad it's behind us. I just bring it up to say, you know what? Deny, deny, deny seems to work.

[crosstalk]

Please make a note.  He did not dredge that story up in order to knock the Clintons.  It sprang out of his mouth unassisted by his brain.  Or did it?

CARLSON: But it's also -- but it's evidence, in Larry Craig's case -- I mean, you know, you just watch the press conference, and you see a man who's not in possession of himself. I mean, there's something -- you know, I'm not a shrink, but there's clearly something wrong with Larry Craig. He appeared to believe it. This is a guy who's been accused repeatedly over the years of soliciting sex from men in bathrooms. So the chances that he's arrested for the same thing accidentally --

ABRAMS: Right, right, right.

CARLSON: What, he's the unluckiest man and he's Job?

SCARBOROUGH: Hey, Tucker?

CARLSON: You know what I mean? It's insane!

SCARBOROUGH: Was he the guy in Georgetown, Tucker?

CARLSON: No, actually. I got that -- my point is -- let me just say --

ABRAMS: Tucker, what did you do, by the way? What did you do when he did that? We got to know.

CARLSON: I went back with someone I knew and grabbed the guy by the -- you know, and grabbed him, and -- and -- [Emphasis mine.]

ABRAMS: And did what?

CARLSON: Hit him against the stall with his head, actually!

[laughter]

CARLSON: And then the cops came and arrested him. But let me say that I'm the least anti-gay right-winger you'll ever meet --

[laughter]

CARLSON: -- but I do think doing this in men's rooms appears to be common. It's totally wrong, and they should knock it off. I mean that. I think it's -- I can't bring my son to the men's room at the park where he plays soccer because of all these creepy guys hanging around in there. I actually think it's a problem. I'm sorry.

So Tucker thinks it's alright to beat someone up because they made a pass at him.  What a sorry ass mo-fu.  As one commenter on another sight wrote, it's too bad Tucker's victim wasn't an undercover cop.  That would have put a different kink in his bird, now wouldn't it. 

Now, I'm not advocating for tearoom sex.  I just think people are overreacting just a tad.

As for these "straight" men who are so incensed and disgusted about the idea of even contemplating sex with another man, get over yourselves.  You've had worse things in your mouth.

AN UPDATE:

Tucker Carlson responds to Media Matters.

Let me be clear about an incident I referred to on MSNBC last night: In the mid-1980s, while I was a high school student, a man physically grabbed me in a men's room in Washington, DC. I yelled, pulled away from him and ran out of the room. Twenty-five minutes later, a friend of mine and I returned to the men's room. The man was still there, presumably waiting to do to someone else what he had done to me. My friend and I seized the man and held him until a security guard arrived.

Several bloggers have characterized this is a sort of gay bashing. That's absurd, and an insult to anybody who has fought back against an unsolicited sexual attack. I wasn't angry with the man because he was gay. I was angry because he assaulted me.

That doesn't exactly mesh with the batshit he was spewing on the air, does it?  So instead of Pussyboy being a Gay basher, he's just a liar. Well, that's all the difference in the world to me.

Free Larry Craig!

Idaho Republican Senator Larry Craig was busted back in June for lewd behavior in a public restroom for supposedly playing tapping footsies with an undercover cop. Upon being arrested, Senator Craig quickly plead guilty, paid a small fine, and was on his way ... or so he thought. Now, according to the report by the arresting officer, all that the Senator did was to indicate some sort of interest in the officer. No sex took place.  If soliciting in public were against the law, no one would ever get a date. 

Okay, Craig is a scumbag, and we know why he was there and what he was up to, but he did nothing wrong. Gays have been putting up with this type of harassment for years -- not that Sen. Craig is Gay. He's not. He's a sick man with homosexual tendencies, but homosexual tendencies do not make someone Gay. 

Gay is reserved for people who claim their sexuality, and are proud of who and what they are. Sen. Craig is a dishonest, immoral, sleazy, cock-sucking asshole, but he is not Gay, and what he did in that restroom in Minneapolis is not criminal. He should never have been arrested, and he should never have been charged. His guilty plea came from his embarrassment and guilt of conscience for getting caught at his shenanigans.

Glenn Greenwald evicerates the Wingnuts over their reaction to Mike Rogers' post last October outing Senator Craig for his t-room cruising around Washington as compared to their banshee wailings today. 

The closet is a terrible place to live.  Come out, come out, wherever you are. 

In Memoriam

Ellen Crush, a fellow blogger, died yesterday morning following a two plus year fight against cancer.  She used her blog, Emptying My Head, to share with us her joy of life as well as the details of her struggle.  She leaves a body of work that will continue to resonate forever.  She was a teacher by profession who gave generously of herself to students and to friends.  I am fortunate to have been able to know her even slightly.  She leaves behind a loving and heartbroken husband, Curtis.  My heart aches for him right now, for it is the living who feel the pain of death.  Peace to you, Curtis. 

Thank you, Ellen, for discovering my blog and taking the time to write and encourage me.  Thank you for introducing me to so many talented writers.  Peace be to you now, dear sister.  You will be sorely missed.

UPDATE:  Kathy Bell has written a beautiful and eloquent tribute to Ellen. 

Maybe It's Just Me, but...

I just watched Senator What's His Name, the senior Republican senator from Virginia, in an interview with JoAnn Woodruff.  He really sounded like a blithering idiot.  He's all smoke and no fire.  He don't know shit.  He is so last century.

Bush Bumper Stickers

From one of my favorite cousins, now living in Alabama.

Bush Bumper Stickers for 07

1. Bush: End of an Error
2. That's OK, I Wasn't Using My Civil Liberties Anyway
3. Let's Fix Democracy in this Country First
4. If You Want a Nation Ruled By Religion, Move to Iran
5. Bush. Like a Rock. Only Dumber.
6. If You Can Read This, You're Not Our President
7. Of Course It Hurts: You're Getting Screwed by an Elephant
8. Hey, Bush Supporters: Embarrassed Yet?
9. George Bush: Creating the Terrorists Our Kids Will Have to Fight
10. Impeachment: It's Not Just for Blow Jobs Anymore
11. America: One Nation, Under Surveillance
12. They Call Him "W" So He Can Spell It
13. Whose God Do You Kill For?
14. Jail to the Chief
15. No, Seriously, Why Did We Invade Iraq ?
16. Bush: God's Way of Proving Intelligent Design is Full Of Crap
17. Bad President! No Banana.
18. We Need a President Who's Fluent In At Least One Language
19. We're Making Enemies Faster Than We Can Kill Them
20. Is It VietnamYet?
21. Bush Doesn't Care About White People, Either
22. Where Are We Going? And Why Are We In This Hand basket?
23. You Elected Him. You Deserve Him.
24. Dubya, Your Dad Shoulda Pulled Out, Too
25. When Bush Took Office, Gas Was $1.46
26. Pray For Impeachment
27. The Republican Party: Our Bridge to the 11th Century
28. What Part of "Bush Lied" Don't You Understand?
29. One Nation Under Clod
30. 2004: Embarrassed 2005: Horrified 2006: Terrified
31. Bush Never Exhaled
32. At Least Nixon Resigned

Let Us Now Praise Dennis Kucinich (or at least his YouTube Team)

Save the Constitution

What is truly sad is the lack of clear statements by our presidential candidates which would

• reject the idea of signing statements as a backdoor veto
• reject the idea of the unitary executive in any form
• acknowledge the importance of checks and balances and separation of powers
• commitment to maximum defense of the Bill of Rights, pointing out that “protection” and “security” which overrides those is neither protection or security of America as we have known it

That is one reason I find it hard to motivate myself for a presidential race that is moving too quickly, and is too much about personalities, and not about us.

From Teacherken's diary at Daily Kos via Lambert at Corrente Wire.

Our Constitutional form of government is under extreme stress.  I have not heard any of the candidates acknowledge the problem.  Mostly they think the wrong person is emperor. 

We need to demand that they address the root problem.